A Seamless Childcare Transition: Things To Do To Help Your Child - Part Two
Beginning these routines early can help ease both you and your toddler into the shift from home to daycare, leading to a smoother adjustment and reduced separation anxiety.
1. Communicate When You Will Pick up
Clear pickup communication turns a scary unknown into a safe, predictable story your child can trust. Toddlers don’t think in hours; they believe in anchors, sequences, and sensory cues. Also, please remind your child of any changes to pickups on the day of the pickup. For example, remind your toddler in the morning at home that their grandmother is picking them up from daycare after their lunch.
Use Anchors, Not Clock Time
Anchor to routines: “I’ll be back after afternoon snack,” or “when the big story is finished.”
Sequence picture cards: Make a 4-step visual plan, such as Playtime → Lunch → Nap → Pickup. Encourage your child to move a clothespin along as the day progresses, and have them verbally communicate each step.
Classroom match: Ask your child’s teacher to identify the most consistent daily language, routine, and steps. Then, use the same wording, events, and steps at home and at drop-off.
Goodbye bracelet: Attach a soft bracelet to your child’s wrist and a matching one to yours. Say to them, “We match until pickup.”
The Countdown: Give a few post-its at drop-off to your child's teacher; the teacher will post them up and remove one after each major. For example, after a snack, after a nap, and the last one just before pickup.
Pickup picture cue: Place your photo or a family picture in your child's cubby so that when they miss you, they can go and see the image. This approach is more effective for children with secure attachments to their parents, as they are less likely to become upset upon seeing the picture.
One consistent signal: Say the exact short goodbye phrase at drop off each day to your child; this can make it feel like part of the routine. You can make this change once your child becomes very comfortable with daycare.
Build A Pickup Routine
Keep it short and specific: “I’ll be back after nap and snack. I’ll read you the dinosaur book at pickup.”
Use the teacher echo: Ask educators to repeat your promise after you leave: “Mama said you will read a dinosaur book after pickup.”
Repair if late, say to your child, “I said after snack; I was late today. I’m sorry. Tomorrow I will be here after snack again.” Consistent repair keeps trust intact.
Consistency builds secure attachment: Kept promises, even repaired ones, teach your child faster that “you go, but you return,”.
Give agency: Let your child choose the pickup ritual: “High-five → water bottle → cubby” or “hug”.
Consistent language: Parents and teachers use the same phrases, such as “After nap and snack,” instead of saying “in two hours”. Toddlers need one story. When families and caregivers echo the same pickup language and cues, kids internalize the routine faster and explore more confidently.
Celebrate the wait: Say, “You did it, snack, nap, play, and then I came back.” Reinforce their coping, not just the reunion.
Two-way picture book: Create a book for your child, featuring a home page, an image of you at work, a school page of your child at play, and a reunion page of both together. Read it nightly for a week pre-start.
Color-code days: Create an easy code with your child, for example, Green = mom/dad pickup, Blue = grandparent, Yellow = nanny. Place the color on the fridge each morning and verbally say it to your child.
Window ranges: Use ranges with anchors: “I’ll be back between outside play and snack cleanup.”
Common Pitfalls To Avoid
Avoid Sneaking Out: It erodes trust even if it shortens tears. Say goodbye, every time.
Don’t Overpromise: Use anchors you control. If traffic’s common, anchor to a later routine you can meet.
Limit check-ins during hard adjustment weeks: One mid-day update from the teacher is better than frequent calls that re-trigger separation.
2. Prep By Talking About Daycare
Each day, have talks with your child about daycare, such as asking them about fun activities, their friends, and toys that they like. Daycare talk can help your child start envisioning what this experience might be like. Talk about: what daycare is, why kids go there, what it might look like, how they might feel, how you feel about leaving them, and what their day might look like. For example, "at lunchtime you will sit at a table with other children and eat together”.
Prepping Your Child
Talk about:
The daycare schedule, transitions, activities, and environment.
The duration your child will be at daycare.
Where and what you will be doing at work, for example, ‘‘Mommy will be at work while you are at daycare doing fun activities. After work, I will come and get you, and we'll come home”.
The different kinds of children and teachers who might be at the daycare.
What taking a nap at daycare might look and feel like. Remind your child to be quiet, even when they're not resting.
The importance of listening to their daycare teachers and following class rules.
The foods that they might have. Then, start giving your child some of them at home.
Start :
Role-playing scenarios about having fears, nerves, emotions, and how to work through them.
Listening to your child as they express their feelings and emotions about going to daycare.
Exposing your child to new social environments where they can talk to other children, make sounds, learn new words, listen to others, form comfort levels, and acquire new play skills.
Reading story picture books about going to daycare, being separated, parents going to work, and meeting new kids. This can give your child a visual representation of what might happen and help them see themselves in the same situation.
Having a visit to the daycare with your child. Look around the classroom and walk around the daycare, giving your child time to observe and ask questions.
Reminding your child that going to daycare is a daily thing.
3. Start Using Daycare Language
Please start using words, names of objects, and comments that your child might hear at daycare. Begin by discussing things your toddler might encounter, taste, experience, and do at daycare. Letting your child hear your excitement, kind words about their teachers, and openness can help them adjust their thoughts about daycare more positively.
Words that you can start teaching at home
Your child’s name.
‘‘More’’.
‘‘Please’’.
‘‘Thank you’’.
‘‘Help’’.
‘‘Bathroom words’’.
‘‘Clothing words’’.
‘‘Sleep time’’.
Signs that can be taught at home
More.
Please.
Water.
Help.
A few food signs include milk, crackers, and cookies.
4. Prep For The Daycare World
Ease into the start
In the beginning, starting your toddler’s daycare week on a Wednesday, if possible, might help them transition more comfortably and get used to the daycare world experience better. By starting on a Wednesday, your child can have 3 days at daycare and then have the weekend and a few extra days to spend time together with you.
Daycare is a new experience, so your child might feel a bit stressed, overwhelmed, scared, and angry. Finding what works best for your individual toddler can help them succeed during this process.
My suggestions for these three days
The drop-off: This time can be around 8:00- 8:15 am. This is usually when the class has only a few kids present, making it a bit quiet.
A good goodbye: It is recommended that parents give their toddlers a proper goodbye before leaving.
Crying: Most of the time, your child will be crying, but they will eventually calm down. Over time, they will see that things will be alright.
The pick-up: This time can be after lunch, around 11:30, which can give your child a chance to get a feel for how things are at daycare.
Continue reading positive books about daycare, role-playing, and talking about daycare at home.
Read Books About Daycare
Each night, read a realistic picture book with your child about going to daycare until they become comfortable.
This can help your child prep their mind and emotions for this experience.
Picture books can help build reassurance, personal connection, and a sense of excitement and knowledge.
Good books for two years and up
Llama, Llama goes to school.
Llama, Llama Missies Mama.
When Mama Goes To Work.
Good books for 16-20 months
Hey, Baby! A Baby’s Day in Doodles.
Find Spot At Nursery.
Llama, Llama Missies Mama.
When Mama Goes To Work.
Owl Babies by Martin Waddell
Talk About Daycare
Each day, discuss daycare and make connections between your child's activities at home and at daycare.
Encourage your child to help you prepare for daycare by gathering their backpack and packing their essentials while singing daycare songs.
Begin discussing different ethnicities positively and respectfully with your child. Within the daycare world, there are so many cultures of staff and children that your child can meet.
If your family speaks a different language at home, please share a few words and information about your culture with your child’s teacher. Examples of words are hello, eat, outside, and goodbye.
5. Get Proper Daycare Supplies
This is an excellent opportunity to spend time with your child as they help you prepare and gather things for daycare. Gathering and shopping for daycare supplies can be turned into songs, challenges, and games to help keep your toddler more engaged. For example, encourage your child to help gather items, such as their diapers, backpack, extra clothing, or a blanket.
Home Things To Start Doing
Choices: Give your child daily choices between different activities or options.
Take a tour: Go with your child to their new daycare center, walk outside the building, and then look inside their classroom. Talk together about what you see, the foods they might eat, the warm energy, the other children playing, and how fun it looks.
Set up the structure: Be consistent with your child’s bedtime, home rules, transitions, and when you say something. Also, begin doing transitions at home.
Pre-plan: Consider your first day back at work and aim to start within a week of your child's daycare start date, in case you need to pick up earlier. Also, create a drop-off and pick-up plan.
Independence: Give your child room, time, and space to be independent each day. Give your child space to develop self-help skills like pulling down their pants, putting on their shoes, and playing independently.
Walking: Start taking short walks where your child can practice walking.
Learning skills. Let your children feed themselves at mealtime by providing them with child-sized utensils. Please encourage your child to use their words when asking for things and practice waiting sometimes for your attention.
Outdoor Play: Include at least one hour of daily outside play and at least one nap on home days.
Reminders: Begin reminding your child that daycare will soon become a regular part of their routine, helping them prepare for it.
6. Things For Parents To Do In The First Week
Set a regular sleep routine
Begin by establishing a bedtime for your toddler as part of building a consistent sleep schedule at home. Remember to include things that are done before bedtime. The process of your child learning to fall asleep with minimal assistance takes time, so please allow them to practice.
Do a check-in
Take a moment to touch base with your child’s teachers by making a check-in phone call or speaking with them at pick-up time. Most daycare centers offer an app that provides parents with information about their child’s day.
Fill up the home freezer
Consider some easy meal ideas and then stock up the freezer with quick, healthy meal options. For example, frozen vegetables, frozen cooked chicken, and frozen fish.
Take it easy and let out your emotions
It’s ok to cry, feel anxious, be sad, or have fears or nerves, read stories, do puppet shows, and talk about feelings with your child. It’s important to share with your toddler that “you will miss them’’ but remind them that you will come back and pick them up after work is finished.
Celebrate pickups
Take some time to reflect and talk with your child about their day, including what they ate and who they played with. This can all be done while they collect their things or walk out of the daycare. Ask open-ended questions so that your child can talk and share more vs saying just yes or no, for example, “what was your favourite activity that you did today?” or “how was the library today, what book did you get?”